It is said that next to death our greatest fear is making a speech. For most of us being asked to speak before an audience causes us to panic. Our stomachs freeze up and our heart races.This can happen even if we have experiences of successful speeches. Fear freezes us up.Unlike most people I actually enjoy being in front of an audience. I suspect that like people who enjoy writing there is a 5-10 % of the population who enjoy speaking. It's interesting that people who write well are not necessarily good speakers. I owe my love of writing to my mother who made me write weekly letters to her mother.
Like most people I was scared of speaking in public since I was shy. One of my high school teachers thought the best thing was to deceive me into debating. He made me a researcher for the debate team. I worked closely with the three man team and was quite animated in private while arguing points. A few hours before the debate my teacher said that one member of the team could not made it. Therefore I had to go on and do his bit.It so happened that the 'missing' person was the leader and so I had to speak first.
Several decades later I an recall vividly how scared I was. My teacher assured me I would do well.His first advice was to view the audience like my friends and family."You are quite fluent among your friends. This is just a slightly larger group."
Then he gave me a tip that was a virtual lifeline. " Choose a friendly face in the audience and speak as if you are talking to that person."
I chose the sister of one of my school friends. Little does she know that her smiling,comforting face prevented me from collapsing on stage. That night I spoke in passionate tones to just one member of the audience. Following my teacher's advice I spoke slower than normal and imagined my voice hitting the wall at the end of the room and coming back to me. When we finished that night my friends crowded around me and congratulated me on leading the debate team to a big win. Among that group was the leader of the team who was 'ill'.My teacher then confessed his ruse to get me going as a speaker. I have not looked back since that first time. Though when I still remember how I feared the room would open up and swallow me.
Among the things I would emphasize is the need for preparation and structure . It is often amusingly said that all you have to do is tell the audience what you are going to say,tell them and then remind them at the end of what you told them.This is like a famous folk story about the success of a village fool as a teacher.
The Village Fool wandered to a town far away from his home.The town was expecting a famous scholar and mistook the Fool for him.They rushed him to the town hall and implored him to teach them.
Stunned, but living by his wits, the Fool thundered to his rapt audience:" Do you know what I'm going to teach you?"
" No,we don't,"they replied adoringly.
" You are too ignorant for me to teach" said the Fool storming out of the hall.
The audience rushed after him begging him to teach them again. He agreed to do so a week later. In the meantime he attended many events but spoke sparingly. All were convinced of his wisdom.
The next time he ascended to the platform and gravely asked the same question as he did the previous time.
" Do you know what I am going to teach you?"
This time the audience shouted gleefully: " Yes ,we do."
The Fool smiled and said as he left," Then my work is done. You already know all. "
The audience was amazed and thought that the Fool was truly wise so they asked him to speak to them one more time as they felt they knew the best response to his question.
So when the Fool got up and asked in his confident way,"Do you know what I am going to teach you?" half the the crowd said "Yes" and the other half said "No".
The Fool smiled. Then said " Well, those who know will teach those who don't know."
The Fool then left the town with all in awe of his wisdom.
Another useful tip is to establish rapport with your audience, say something that links you to them.Also it's never a good idea to try to speak about something you are not passionate about.You need the energy of you belief to move you and your listeners.It is absolutely critical that your speech has 'bridges' in it to help your listeners to cross from one idea group to another. You must give clear indications when you are moving on. So transitional phrases like "As an example of this" or "This brings us to the larger problem of," assist in understanding.
Do develop a sense of your listeners' engagement with you. Keep an ebb and flow as you go though the stages of your speech. In time you'll learn to create anticipation For example I have listened three times live to Harv Eker's Millionaire Mind Evening speech and I always marvel at how comfortably he paces the speech.Observing him close up I noticed that he seemed to 'play' the audience's energy level.Like actors, successful speakers have a great sense of timing. They speak 'to' people not 'at' people. They are aware that they have to fine tune their ability to receive responses from their audience and keep reacting to them.
When you are preparing you speech establish clearly what your central speech focus is.In one sentence, like a corporate mission statement, you must be able to say what your speech is about.Preparation is in two main parts --content and delivery.After you have got clear what you want to say practice and practice often.Observe yourself in a mirror. Try different shadings of voice. Observe your facial and body movements as you say certain parts. Record yourself on video and critique yourself. Don't be too harsh on yourself. Pay attention to what you are doing right and build on that.Above all remember that you must make eye contact with the people in front of you. Don't make the mistake of keeping eye contact with the paper on which your speech is written!
My advice is to have key points and an outline on index cards.It is possible to train yourself to speak from memory especially if you rehearse often. Work on having a memorable ending. Study good speeches and model your ending on theirs. Your audience should leave with a feeling that their time was spent in a worthwhile way.
Finally ,today, I recognize that the best way to work with people is to deal with their fears about speaking and doing well before others. I use a simple tapping and affirmation process called Emotional Freedom Technique. It has helped many with performance anxiety.
Milton Drepaul is co-author of CXC English and CXC English B . He is an Career Consultant,Educator,Writer,Business Consultant and Resume Expert. Clients can view his website at http://www.theresumexpert.com.
Changing Someones Bad Attitude
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